For the past 6 months or so I’ve been struggling a lot with sleep and my sleeping pattern. Unfortunately for me, I seem to be someone who is easily ‘excited’ despite how tired I am. This is a major problem that prevents me from going to sleep for hours after I go to bed because I can’t turn my brain off or I start thinking about something and end up waking myself up to the point where I can’t get to sleep.
I’ve tired a number of different things to try and correct this but to no avail. I wondered if part of the reason for not being able to turn my brain off might have been because I wasn’t being particularly active during the day, but this doesn’t seem to make much difference as the days when I was a lot more active were still nights where I struggled to fall asleep. I have also tried to have more of a routine at night like being in bed by a certain time and not going on my phone after a specific time, but similarly, this didn’t seem to make much difference.
For about a month last year my sleeping habits were so bad that I often found myself awake until 4/5am and was then waking up between 10am and 11am. As a uni student with a fairly flexible timetable, this wouldn’t have bothered me as much if I was able to be focused enough to be doing work during the night, but I wasn’t; I felt drained and as if my body was tired and ready for sleep but my brain was wide awake as if I’d not long woken up. No matter how much I wished for sleep or counted sheep on the very bad nights, I was unable to stop thinking about a number of different things. I’ve read so many different blog posts and articles about sleep and things to try to fall asleep easier, but so far nothing has worked.
On the flip side of my sleeping struggles has been the recent development where I’m sleeping for ridiculous lengths of time – almost 12 hours one night! There have been several days in the last couple of months where I’ve had over 10 hours sleep. For anyone who knows me, this is very unusual, and for me was actually worrying. Yet, the days when I had slept for a longer than normal length of time were the days that I felt the most drained and had no motivation to do anything.
Ultimately I know this is all about balance. In some ways I’m more fortunate that I feel better having less sleep than more, but finding the balance and having a stricter routine is something that I struggle with. I’ve never really been a person for routines or doing things at certain times when I have the choice. I’m definitely more of a go with the flow and do things when I want to kind of person as long as everything gets done.
Let’s pray that one day I will be able to sleep for a normal amount of time and at normal times of the day!